One of my most asked questions—- especially recently as I moved into a new apartment with Sara— is why I’m not living with Austin. I get asked this all the time, mostly here on the blog, so I figured I would dedicate an entire blog post to it.
Before I explain my reasons, I want you to remember these are my reasons, and this is what makes sense for my life at the moment. Everyone is different! So I’m not “against” another person’s decision to live with their significant other before marriage. This is just what works for us
Like I mentioned there are a few reasons why Austin and I choose not to live together. I’ll touch on each reason in no specific order.
Reason #1? We’re not ready. We’ve been together for 2 1/2 years now, but we both don’t feel ready to live together. Moving in together is such a huge step for a relationship, and we’re comfortable with where we are right now. We don’t feel an urge to live together just yet.
#2. We like our independence. I like having my own space and so does he. Even though he has an extra room in his apartment (not like we would stay in separate rooms, but there would be space for my stuff) I would miss having my own place! My decor, my furniture, etc.
#3. He’s about to start one of the hardest years of his life. He just started his first year of law school. Everyone I talk to (who’s been through it) is like OMG good luck!!! So I know he will have barely any time to spend with me, and it’s going to suck for awhile. I don’t want to interfere with his studies too much. I know if we lived together and he studied at home, I would always be distracting him haha. On weekends if he’s studying at home I wouldn’t really be able to invite friends over, listen to music, etc.
#4. I want to save that special “next chapter” for a time when engagement/marriage is just around the corner. I mean, it’s such a big step for a relationship!!! And such a special moment. I definitely want to save that for a time when we are 100% ready, and I know he wants to be confident about his work situation, etc.
I know I have readers from a lot of different countries, and maybe some of this might sound “strange” to you, but that’s the beauty of different cultures! To me, it really just depends on the two people in the relationship, the circumstances, and your beliefs. And these are mine!
I would love to hear your open opinion on living with a significant other before marriage! Leave a comment below.